Best Practices for Employee Surveys

I was on LinkedIn and came across a discussion question I couldn't help from answering.

The question was:

"I am looking for some guidance in determining best practices for a 6-month new employee survey."

This was my response:
Is it really best practices from a new hire you need? Most still have yet to find the cafeteria.
What's really important is to know if they are engaged, working for a caring, knowledgeable manager, understand the underlying driving forces to help achieve the "business of the business" get along with co-workers, culture and a bit more.
We have been doing this survey stuff for over 15 years and the only need you have is to make sure new hires are keeping their "bloom" on the flower. The items asked must have a capability for a quick fix, usually through manager relationships. Have a means to identify each worker by manager, and give each manager a report card as to how well they are mentoring their hires. It's one thing to ask questions, its another thing to have actions and fix what you discovered.

For analysis to have meaning, upscale from survey monkey. Get away from tools whose results only give high level norms or polling type results without analysis competencies like cross tabs, unlimited demographic slicing, comparing, etc.
 
Instead, get results that give you directed action plans that you can wrap your hands around.